Why CAA 2019 is India’s UPI to World’s Refugee Crisis: A Governance Hack to World’s Problems

Its taking an ugly turn just short of a pre-cursor of any civil war out here. Winter of yet another year of India, where its also coming winters of Start Up funding. This is the December of 2019.

Temperatures around the world soaring. Not just literally, but also in actuals. Say, on one end, the headcounts of World’s Refugees across the world exceeds in 70 Million on date, while at another corner there in the world’s happiest country Finland today, temperatures today is just around 0 when it should it have been -15 degrees or lower; in this December of 2019. And temperatures soaring uniformly across.

So, before I talk out the point, which is quite elaborate intricate, I want to take you deep into the jungles of context. May I bring you closer to the world around the axis of times. December of 2019 it is, as you all know. Crucial Winters of Hostile temperatures. World’s Debts factor in for 2.5 times the Global GDP with growth rates of countries falling down. Every unit square kilometer of landmass tending to become some degree of Venezeula. Status Quo way of lifestyle of humans has collapsed, uniformly across.

As you touchdown to present on the Earth, you find, Sydney is witnessing summers of unheard kinds, birds falling to death from trees in day light. Also reported of forest fire, as reports came last. You see that Gurgaon of India which has become now Gurugram, was in the movie Nayak Mode (of Bollywood) on Dec 19. You go on to see a not so well to do VC of California mocking around why he doesn’t invest in the “Country of Customers Less than a Cuddle Away”.

From the pains of the offline real world, you come to the virtual world to soothe yourself. You go on to see an English writer from not so Great Britain, propagating how Dominion to the crown which has a club of countries to its name (The Commonwealth), which itself doesn’t know of decorums of Club of Countries, the crown which went on splitting borders over rulers and set squares, even using protectors and ropes on occasions, which out of the habit of drawing borders drew the final one for itself (which you know as #BREXIT), you find this author narrating how Dominion to this Crown accelerated the humans to prosperity in just 2000 years. And similarly, as you graze to humans, you find each of them on a roll of their own.

This author I’m talking about, perhaps also goes on to add that it happened due to awakening of Religion, with a buzz that it was Christainity that you got to be aware that you invented zero. You did apply 0 but you were not aware that it was 0, with christainity you named it zero, you got aware, and you invented, and you prospered to Mangalyaans in just 2000 years. How that journey happened, a journey of that. And similarly on their own paths humans on a roll of their own, which comes down cumulatively in form of soaring temperatures such that the Spheroid Earth deflates to attain a shape of Rugby ball with each rotation.

Temperatures Soaring, tragedies on standby, sailing the world of Earth over iceberg deep freezing waters which oppose motion. Not to miss the Debts factoring 2.5x the GDP. Stress on energy is be non-polluting, democracies requiring to be inclusive, even as Status Quos of the world is going in the direction opposite to the direction of safety it ought to be. The world is severely heated. Chaos and escalations equal in loudness all around.

In this sequence of heat, surprisingly with a lot of amazement, which is also not a surprise as it looks, for the property of being continuous in nature since the backdrop Y2K of 2000, rolled out as mindful succession planning in the wake of Kargil 99, guided under the grace of Late JFR Jacob and Dewang Mehta, in this subcontinent where continents merge, from UID to Flipkarts to Paytms to UPI, in this peninsula south to Himalayas: India has been delivering a series of tacky hacks in a laps of quick turns.

In less than three decades since the dampening of cold wars, India has been Engineering Global Answers to Global Problems. Like UPI and UID as they stand tall to this testimony, here they’ve delivered a Policy Hack just disruptive towards solving the World’s Refugee Crisis. Of a Mathematical Policy, a smart trigger that can potently restore human habitation to its origins.

Citizen Ammendment Act in technicals, a Citizen Rehabiliation Program of times of World’s Refugee Crisis, is a Flagship Inclusion Program for Citizens in India from Government of India. Coming back off rides of massive aggressive programs on inclusion. Most notably this Financial Inclusion Movement called Jan Dhan Yojana, as Indians have just delivered Payment Banks for which the dumb world used to use Credit Cards about the function of Machine Liquid Currency. So a Giant Leap prepared over continuous series of small giant leaps, in the fields of Governance, Policies and Human reconciliations at Human levels, a program of Citizen Inclusion. That’s the CAA. (There is chaos about it we all know for which we’re meeting to quell)

In a world which has every 100th Human as refugee, headcounts in excess of 70 Millions, world over, where sovereign nations sell citizenships because they are cash strapped, they’ve programs like Citizenship Against investment, and residencies against cash, from Canada in the far west to the New Zealand in the far east, almost 68 nations when sell citizenships for sale, in that world which repels the poor refugees and invites the rich for Mountains of Cash, in that world of exclusion, it an inclusion and reconciliation programs of citizens who find themselves in lands of no man. Like UID and UPI have already shown their magic. The world queuing up doors to India to import mechanisms and models of governance. (Karnataka of India is a Champion of last Mile Deliveries of Governance may I also add on). Is India answering to Global Problems super-fluid. And no wonder why is the chaos.

Its no surprising for what the Western World had Credit Card, the Indians invented a Payment Bank for the substitution. And you’d be most surprised when I tell you why they’re coming up so much at rapid pace in successions, what the core of that root- that damned ‘Corruption’ that a generation spent complaining in theory and living it up in practice. Manufacturing Solutions out of wiring machines where in the past lived humans.

India in the first time in Human History is having footages of riots recorded? They’re converting these cues into actions and laws. And, that tells you what magic machine interventions in human life can do. Of which India has become unparalleled champions over 30 years of sustained gymming. From the very lifestyle of Satyamev Jayate Conditions Apply, solutions of establishment of Satyamev Jayate, this momentous times are these.

In this other world of context, out of context, may I tell you, If China is about hardwares, India is about process excellence. India’s agility has been of listening. And reviewing data. Because they trust none, flexibility to change minds is higher along with the energy to execute.

In this age when Data is the Oil, when oil is not fuel, oil not the lubricant, oil not the trigger, oil not the matrix, when humans are humans no more, in the days when humans are marketplaces, India is the Delta.

I wonder if you could find how surprising is it to be not of surprise element that it is a natural successor to sensibly orchestrated pre-cursor, this CAA is a natural progression of a planned Succession Planning of Human Stack. As a Design Thinker, I won’t be able to pen the romance. (I guess only a Yuvraj Singh whack matches the experience). Its such an elegance of determination, to top out of process.

If Sachin Tendulkar was the man who made Indians need Electricity, here I find a Modi making the Indians need the need of reasoning questions. I can’t help seeping in ecstasy. And what a romance, that a stubborn partner helping cover the effort to keep the flag on the helmet fluttering high. May I also tell you, at this sight Ambedkar would have been partying with Mascrenhas (Tendulkar’s Manager), and Dewang Mehta with with Subhas Bose, such the romance.

So let me unfold you the beauty. Of Problem Statements and Solutions.The art of painting Policies. Let’s begin the problem statement.

World’s Refugee Counts exceeds 70 Mns. (I)
You can’t exclude them and they’re not included. They are as much a security risk as much as they themselves face insecurities. In Micro-economic cases, they deflate currency value and lesser exchange rates.

Of Whole World’s citizen charters, exists no Citizenry list (II)
You don’t know your customers, you don’t know your citizens. For governance, for corporate governance, for resolving escalations, for reconciling the goods and bads, you need a last mile delivery plank.

You’ve a Terribly Stacked Stone Age Economy. Debts 2.5 X GDP (III)
Humans invented zero, learnt counting but could never learn computing. They never knew Accounting. In the meantime came Brits, who needed a family to be frozen in a reality show box, wreaked havoc, began the culture of Aboriginals & Superiors world over. They never could understand what device actually the Money was. What was a dispute resolving device they made into a discriminating and disrupting device of sabotage inducing character. Computers did come to rescue that, but money is so unequally distributed that it no longer goes to expand, the public GDPs go on to reduce while one 1% of the world keeps frozen 58% of the Global wealth to personal whims and abilities to deal with reasons.

If you combine all the three, I’ll tell you it will sum down into reinventing the currency. And It would imperative to all governing agencies, in all micros and macros get into an exercise of Knowing Your Citizens. And more than policy perspective, as an essential security measure. You live in a world where your impressions, facial scans are gateways to your money. If you don’t get identified, you’ll have none to hear to your escalations. And then beyond that, the proposition of advancement of having a real world robust last mile delivery. A step further of as much of advancement as advantages. That the security dimension enforces, it makes it essential which is a different thing.

So How do you solve that? How do you stack it up ?

  1. Do you induce the sources that produce refugees in their to take their people back? (To this add to this India has a neighbour which doesn’t only push human livestock like app notifications, but it also don’t own their dead?).
  2. Do you start framing Architectural Structures to attain superior inter-institutional flexibilities ? (More funnily, also add that in 70 years, India could also not make accept its neighbour of its series of sins for the obstacle of lack of data and evidences)
  3. Do you start stacking supply chains of Last Mile Delivery ? .

Where do you end to connect these dots? Do you think you’ll need a Roll number with Government as your citizen id as the first requirement ?

That is it- the primer of a Inter-Institutional framework- The NRC dashboard. And there CAA, the engineering principle to pave way for a Identifying Serial number like Roll Numbers for the purpose of Justice Harvest in Last Mile.

CAA 1.0 (on for a strategical bias of religion-which in turn is a consequence of the fallout of the fact that the last border drawn in the peninsula south west of himalayas was drawn on basis of religion) helps you to reset the roll arrangement of people stack to its original. Lets you create a free body diagram of the people stack at a given geography. An identifier principle.

Post the CAA, you might and will need several successive round of inclusions which will be called CAA 2.0, CAA 2.7, CAA 4.0, CAA Jelly Bean and so on. Wherein will there be Guiding Principle that GDP = Productivity Per Capita multiplied by summation of CAA headcounts.

Begin addressing the problems of Human Reconciliations at Human Levels. That with efficiency of Last Mile Supplied. Think rehabiliating humans in on the ball of soil amidst springing jungles with a goal of restoring Natural Purity. You’ll everytime end up solving RTO of Couriers (meaning Returns to Origins), you’ll every time end up policies like CAA.

Like you begin selection through rejection, this is a march of inclusion in the world of barriered exclusion which also pivots on cash.


Giving Clean-chit to Ambedkar

Until today, I had deemed Ambedkar Bhimrao the doctor, the architect of the constitution of India- illiterate. In my eyes he was all but an over-rated dumb labour- just another lame non-entrepreneur out of billions. And every time I had a brush with the constitution and its derivatives or the law of the land which also happened in plenty being an entrepreneur, I only had abuses for the guy. In my eyes, the only good thing that he’d done that he had chosen complex English. While Hindi was already tougher to understand to the Indians. The law remained largely out of bounds of interpretation, as remain the cases and escalations pending in the queues of Indian Courts whichever have been out of understanding.

So I assumed like any Indian grad that he was, he must have known nothing. I always used to be baffled of the fact that if all he did was copying, then why did the fool need close to three years to pull up a document that is referred as the Andha Kanoon or the Constitution of India.

And no, it’s not that bad customer experience or the bad citizenship at the hands of Indians that I got this bias derived out of. Which for that matter is best explained from the life of Steve Jobs. The guy had come smitten out of inspiration to this nation, specially to the mystic Himalayas. But, “God, if you save me today, I promise I’ll be a good human all my life hereafter”, were the last words before the mental preparation to the decision to return back, only to return back never.

It wasn’t that Jobs was an exception for his skin color. We have been the same to whoever has had a purpose, even from down the grounds. For instance, Dashrath Manjhi- the guy who dismantled a mountain to build a road in 22 years, same to Shyamlal of Chattisgarh who dug a pond in 27 years upon which a whole cluster of villages thrive like an oasis in a desert. We mock as hostile hosts to everyone until one comes with a large benefiting gift. Once the gift is there to splurge on, we might upgrade them to status of God to derive benefits out.

So it wasn’t the hostilities received that gave me the hatred for Ambedkar. The laws and bent of mind of my compatriots around, certainly to an extent, but not the whole. Cages are devices only for birds who don’t know to fly. The case with me was different. My curiosity was why was the Kanoon Andha or the law blind ? Here was the need of normal eyes plus as many CCTVs as possible, plus a scientific measurable probe for fairness equipped with visions beyond the range of human eyes. Which school the guy went who imagined and established law as one blindfolded entity was my worry. What had to be eye + beyond eye + the tech umpire, contrary to the orientation blind, it had to be with visibility in 3D. That as binocular in vision as the geekiest microscope.

Since then, to me Ambedkar was all one illiterate Indian stooge. Same conventional Rata-Chata parroted labour class traditional dull uninspiring ugly useless Bhim at the right place at the right time or the wrong time for that matter. And until today, whenever I’d begin working on anything, or any good work of mine, that begins customarily with cursing Ambedkar. Say, like the Hindus begin something auspicious with a chant Om Shree Ganesh, that for mine used to be cuss beep cuss beep cuss Ambedkar. And to all my failures or suppression at the hands of ill educated unsport hostile compatriots I always blamed this guy, which is also true to a large large and very large extent.

I believe had I been born in Tel- Aviv or California, I’d have been almost close to Edison, and that of the internet age. May be, Elon Musk would have been my Chai-Sutta Guy.

So, with every bad experience, every single use case of encountering any kind of pain, I cursed this guy. And mind you, I’ve taken some extreme bullying all my childhood from an illiterate school from the Socialist Mecca of Bokaro. The SAIL city rots today in tatters, with dark concrete jungles and markets receding each day, even as its natives are found queuing either to hospitals or someone’s door for livelihoods anonymously. You can imagine the volumes of liters of tears would have Ambedkar bled until today, if he were alive. And nowhere do you find a snip of Ambedkar with eyes closed or lit up with a spark. The part of the world that has belief system in a written destiny, could assume me to be the reason, that I don’t let him sleep. So much for my curses.

As I grew old, as I discovered India, which is also way way way more in extent and dimensions than what Nehru himself might have, the hatred grew only stronger, chiefly owing to vagaries of law abuse. In India as we all know, he who has the whip has the bull, so for free justice and the reception around, only to hold up any Work in Progress of the Works of Progresses.

Add to that, he who doesn’t have the bull gets trampled and crushed over by the others’ bulls because you don’t have conflicts here. Here what you have is war, out of envy to caste to creed, sex, age, appearance, language, region, religion or any. Indians are doctors of discrimination and category management if you don’t know. Human Capital Index ranked 124th it has- 123rd worst mileage per unit effort. Everybody doubts, hates and supersedes everybody.

The concept of God might have been devised to instill modesty in Humans, but before that he must have come to control Indians. As reflected in the beauty of the fact that Indian courts are the only industrial premises in the world which have more than half the practitioners as frauds and quacks declared officially. The whole world might have gone machine governed and computer reconciled for transparency, not the Indian law, for the love and incentives of opaqueness.

And again, add to that cumbersome processes of the state, which is tailor made to install obstacles in way of any transaction so as to yield for facility of vaporising in thin air against an appropriate payment. The nation with billions of customers less than a cuddle away is the world’s 100th in the list in Ease of Doing Business, 133rd in Global innovation and amongst the top for the lack of transparency. Thanks to the law of the land, Government gazettes, and of course the unholy Bada Babus- the illegitimate men manning the positions.

Its not an unusual sight for courts to over-run bills and ordinances brought by elected Governments, or for elected governments to amend laws and by-laws illegally in order to extort and harass citizens for ransoms, all for the great ambiguity of law. The abusive amendment of Central Motor Vehicles Act by states like Telangana, Karnataka and many others to extort life time tax for vehicles from other states would be one profound example. A central act can be amended only by President’s assent but rogue state governments could manage that by Governor’s, only to be quashed by respective High Courts, but only after half a decade of civilian activism. Needless to mention the insensitive torture to citizens until then.

If there was a record for abuse per capita for documented books of importance, even the penguins of Antarctica would not disagree it has to be only “The Constitution of India”.

So I’d hated the lawmaker in chief ever since I’d known. And neither did that falsely projected aura of fight against inequality ever awe me like it does to rest of the world. The Criminal Tribes Act of 1871 which had listed nomadic tribes as criminals by birth by the nothing to lose Brits was repealed only in 1959. Ambedkar died clueless well before that. While the Brits turned them criminals who were not, of course forcibly-almost like tattooing on foreheads, Indians made it worse to change it cosmetically in order to play politics. Add to that he also made this fragile fault line of two broad categories- the Forwards and Backwards indelible. Created a well demarcated cartel of alm seeking backwards versus day-light looting forwards to yield for a third world population in the whole by virtue of opposite of Quality Assurance called Reservation.

The Indians now have two kinds of Reservations. Reservation Natural and Reservation-in-paid.

Or in other words public reins of goods and services with them who have the whip to give way for a fixed economy of sleaze. Pitting one group against another for an inevitable fall of both is no achievement, neither wisdom. Add to that again, the dumbo also needed once a separate electorate just as did one another group needed a Pakistan. The vision as an integrated Peninsula, one sub-continent or a common market was perhaps only with JC Bose, Bhagat and Subhash if at all it did (which did). All signature moves of an unworthy non-entrepreneur.

A human with a non-entrepreneurly spirit is as good as a goat.

Fast forward to this date. Here have I been trying to knit a company of my dreams. An institution that the entire humanity has never dreamed of. An internet factory that changes the way humans live. A Sport organisation to let humans evolve happily without a shred of blood, without a hint of fraud and treachery. In the age of machines, our aspiration is to convert mechanized humans to human beings again. The capacity which they’ve lost to centuries of imperialism and inefficient mass manufacturing industrial age. To let the humans of today have a tool of knowledge free of wrongs, to enable right knowledge by reflex. To make continuous quest of knowledge and having a purpose of life an innate lifestyle. And I’ve prospected and separated until date with as many as 62 prospective co-founders including one high heeled Silicone Valley being in the pursuit.

To understand humans and transactions better, this also required traversing up and down through human hierarchies, bargaining gradients, income brackets. A first hand run through professions and cultures and aspirations. Or to be precise tracing path wherever money and orders flow. From the highs of five stars to ruling quarters of law makers to executive desks of bureaucrats be that government or corporate, from cheating NGOs to real value adding societies, from nominally standing statutory bodies like United Nations to malignant slums to geeky labs, from begging anonymously on streets to random sales on trains, from being a CEO to being a paltry labour, it required experimentation with humans on real basis.

To put more light on this, the closest human I resemble to was Devang Mehta- the pace setter of India’s growth story of the 1990s. And our idea of humanity and the world is one with zero artificial deaths- Zero death on account of human origins. Which all it requires is hazard free ambient Governance. If every artificial death is an industrial disaster, arresting the factors of artificial deaths to zero barring the freak accidents. And here am I drafting my Playbooks of which tenets of Governance is the core. Seeking most of my answers as much as possible in biology to keep it as closely knitted to natural ways. Logics and logistics principles from biology, tendencies from anthropology, administration from engineering, directions from entrepreneurship and so on.

Its been more than 17 years experimenting, travelling, compiling and being observant. There would be very few abstracts of humans, humanity and civilization that would be not known to me without use cases. Or perhaps only two things, music and motherhood, which is impossible for me to fathom.

And as I draft my playbooks, I find the closest to have attempted what I’m was Ambedkar. To document stepping stones and basic tenets of common discipline for a broad human mass to be subscribed to. And that in the information age, equipped with internet, internet accounts. Virtual access to almost entire human population on thousands of forums, visibility to millions and billions of reactions and communications. And of course, the Mighty computer with Excel and Word.

A National Constitution as long as India’s for a population as diverse, without Excel and Word must have been the World’s eight wonder or at least ninth after the understanding of Compound Interest.

When we lay organisations, culture, ethos, fundamental principles, working granularity all need to be knit into one cohesive consistent brand for one timeless identity. A broad guiding principle steering macros and micros all converged towards that crafted identity. To illustrate, if I am Ambedkar, my role as the constitutional boss is more to document that essence of soul to draft an identity than to get into micro-management of BAU (Business As Usual) laws. Or in other words, the foremost job to begin with, and almost half the part of the whole job was to select an emblem. An emblem to dissolve into blood before its interpreted and introduced to a new born which guides through entire life without being prompted.

On one hand to ensure constitutional autochthony was a major task negating the shady Government of India Act which was a treacherous anthology of rules to enable reins in hands of unholy influencers – the club of Imperial Natives & Parasitic Brits. On the other it was to knit a clueless ignorant unprepared massive human mass to one identity bound by a common discipline. On one side was hope for brighter future, on the other clutches of hawkish eyes of looters whose only constitution was unsport dominance. All along a parallel landscape of misery, of riots famines conflicts land ownership power restructuring and what not. To reflect the quantum of arbitration involved, there were 7635 amendments tabled for a territory which didn’t know what freedom meant actually, the population which went for wars and riots from all surrounding sides on land the day they had to party. To knit that Start up into a Global Conglomerate of the Future.

More than legal and legislative it was a challenge of approach, the design and branding. To carve templates on which the next change and future build-up was to be based. Its more of engineering than law expertise. And barring Visvesvaraya  India had no other tower of creation to understand its complication who was in his late nineties by then. For a law graduate to play a Tendulkar with a team of mediocres until Dravids and Gangulys join in future along with one odd Kumbles away from limelight on bouncy pitches of post-War expansionist phase against predatory Global behemoths who were still vying for control points along the globe for runways, its inexpressible in words. Which Ambedkar did and delivered.

He could have sided with imperialists, could have made “The Constitution” report to “The Parliament” as happens in the case of British. And we can imagine what a disaster could have that been in the days of social workers like our politicians of today manning parliaments. And there could have been lot of more strange combinations had he been copying from rest of the world. And had he not copy-pasted from around the world, you’d not disagree, the volume of the guiding book would have never gone up. The originals could have been only the directive sketches of the Brand India- The Preamble, Directive Principles, Fundamental duties, emblems and signages. Everything else had to be policies. Had that been slim, we know how much respected it could have been in the hands of kids of erstwhile Zamindaars and demoted Princes of the 1950s.

All of his achievements, I decipher it today when I draft my playbooks, which I find unending. Strings to knit Billions into one direction, one identity, aboard one ship in hope of a future that is to be bright, based on hope. I wonder if I’m doing the same mistake as Ambedkar, which was laying fundamentals on an assumption that everyone boarding the ship in question would be a God and not criminals, but to give it the benefit of optimism and hope, there cannot be other way as well. He was an unparalleled legend indeed.


A successful attempt to Questioning Status Quo: The Accidental Prime Minister

First of all the readers should be apprised with the fact that the movie is based on the book with the same name which tells chronicles former prime minister Manmohan Singh’s tenure.

The actors had added nothing except caricaturing the real life politicians in toto, including lead actors Anupam Kher and Akshay Khanna. It is just reproduction of contemporary events of Indian polity.

Main theme of story is based on the relation between our former prime minister Manmohan Singh and his media Advisor Sanjay Baru, the roles are played by Anupam Kher and Akshay Khanna respectively.

The Accidental Prime Minister is a propaganda film, to show the former prime minister look like a weak man. Who is controlled by, for most of the things, by Sonia Gandhi, Rahul, Priyanka and the cunning caucus around them are shown as the real power behind the throne. On the other side makers of the movie are careful to underline that Singh was honourable, upright and personally incorruptible, but that he overlooked the corruption of his party colleagues. It is also outlined that the root cause of this type pf behaviour of Mr. Singh is the fact that Gandhi family and his colleagues in party has far reaching influence.

Kher’s performance progressively grows on you, gradually evoking empathy for his character. Kher makes Singh’s trademark soft spoken demeanour and skittish walk, his own. You will find yourself rooting for him, whether he is mustering the courage to do the right thing, or succumbing to the powers that play him.

But a lot of support comes from his co-actor Akshay Khanna, who ensures there’s never a dull moment in this political drama. Whether it is the crucial nuclear deal or petty politics that repeatedly threatens his own job, he never lets any tension become palpable, thanks to his easy charm. Often talking into the camera, Khanna is quick to strike a chord with the audience also playing the narrator.

It’s hard to say what is more embarrassing in the film , its content or its craft. What comes as a surprise is just how shockingly bad and shoddy the film is. There is a complete absence of any art or craft in its making. Kher minces through the film, his voice reedy, thin, shaky, his body language nervous and unconfident: at no point does Kher’s Singh look like a man who inhabited the PM ki kursi for two full Lok Sabha terms with any conviction. There doesn’t seem to have been a script in place, just a series of scenes meant to damn Singh, and studded with some unintentionally hilarious passages


Apart from the actors playing the real people (the startlingly-similar looking Bernert stands in for Sonia, Mathur for Rahul, Kumra for Priyanka, Sharma for Ahmad Patel, as well as actors playing Vajpayee, Advani, Lalu Yadav, Mulayam Singh, and other political heavy-weights), there are also actual newsreel flashes with the actual faces: why?

The movie fails to engage the audience for full two hours.

Is Dhoni the new Nayan Mongia?

The world cup is days away. Its in England. And the men in blue are far from settled. Batting line up far from systemically crystallized. Middle order so arranged that by fall of wicket number 5, far away from the grounds, even on paper, it gets difficult to find traces of formal batting. And by fall of two, specially if it includes Virat Kohli, it pretty much projects memories of the 90s. Old cricket fans often get reminiscence of Ajay Jadeja or Robin Singh or the combo of Yuvraj and Dravid, leaving behind a lack of sense of assurance when things are not going well.

The thrill of scripting come backs has been evidently off the radar for quite a long time.

Except for the top three- which is very fixed- the whole set of batting gives a glimpse of unstable variable tail with little certainty. And then the main stem of finishing profile, of that of holding the innings, of manoeuvering small anchoring of breezy pace, like those duties looked after by Suresh Raina, also finishing role like those of Dhoni’s himself, those romantic virtues of cricket, specially out of one dayers, that’s missing. And add to this agony of a batting culture country in a run hungry nation. Cricket is not all the same anymore.

It used to be  a game of brains and intellect. Of passions and purity. And character.

No other game ever has been subject to test of Character and Endurance Certificate as Cricket. Not to miss 8 Hours of machine loaded single advertising realty, which is like single long magnet of customers. No game ever produced as much commerce. And may I tell you another greatness of this game. They say the game’s greatest – Sachin Tendulkar- he was God. He is indeed. Not the God of cricket but the God who made Indians need Electricity . That is Cricket. It has been a game which has also produced real authentic Gods.

In the world, if you needed a model code of Conduct and Integrity and Life and Lifestyle, or should you be seeking answer to the question as to how humans should live, should you quest for an ideal replica for humanity in practice, or say, the way 1 kg is the mass of platinum-iridium alloy kept in SI Units’ museum in Paris, what would be the same for one unit of Humanity, let me break this piece of beauty. The day you’ll define the SI unit of Humanity in Practice, in the end the last standard you’ll conclude to like to keep an alloy of Kumble-Dravid. And like Coulomb (SI unit of Electric Charge), the SI Unit of Human Conduct will be Kumble (after Anil Kumble). This came from Cricket. That because of the virtue of Cricket. Thanks to intricacies of the game.

Additionally, its also a better lifestyle game than Golf, and way more of handling of passion than Basketball. (On a personal note, I feel, cricket never gots its due appreciation, because it was invented by Brits, who have historically been opposite of Sport conduct). But if there was an evaluation for completeness of a sport, measuring for social or fitness or  awareness or strategy or management or just any human attribute at subject of test, this game would come right at the top. Even by the count of ATPs used in a game, if that were an indicator, even then, it must be cricket. Its a beautiful game indeed.

And what has been Jeff Bezos to Retail, or Steve Jobs to computing, in very tangible  likelihoods, you’re going to have an Anil Kumble to Machine Intelligence and Education. What was Steve Jobs to Personal Computing, An Anil Kumble to Education, I can bet my life over such a prediction. The phenomenon because of cricket. And also the conviction in this belief – because of Cricket. That is cricket.

A game of Science and human conduct. And of lots of brains. An intense game which inspires engineering. And a game which has had huge impact on affairs of the world. Its a very beautiful game.

I wonder why I’m so overselling this game. Perhaps may be, because I also see that if everybody played cricket, nobody ever would have had Skin-cancer. Humans would have come to know about holes in ozone the very day they happened. The Humans would also have never had invented Acid Rains. Neither would have ever been Soil Erosion if they played cricket, if everybody played cricket, if it was a cult.  Genuinely beautiful. As beautiful as impactful.

Which is no more as beautiful. As it used to be.

But India happens to be one of the best in the trade. In 170 odd days from now on is to happen its Men’s World Cup, which is reasonably fierce.  And like usual, known for handicapped management, Indians, have screwed it again. By poor management. By poor succession planning. A pristine case of how Indians lose. Signature display of  Indians’ affinity to Mediocrity. Indians are a laid-back bunch of humans who aspire of mediocrity and hunt for superiority in that inferiority of mediocrity. How do they pull off this phenomenon so widely, this case is live demonstration of that. Its as much a subject of cricketing nuances as much of trade and life in practice.

Let me take you to this by design.

That, India and Indians are averse to transparent meritocracy is no new secret. Their father was Gandhi, that alone determined the DNA from the onset. Almost invariably, in every field and every institution, top stakeholders are always rigged, people functions which is supposed to maintain human succession planning in institutions and organisations, Indians have universal reservations of unfair practices. Handicapped of  transparency, as elsewhere, so in cricket, the lead of National Selecting panel (MSK Prasad) himself has neither performed much at the international level, nor has had any other history of team building or leading credentials. In short he has never been a public father who has nurtured National Kids or Institutional Kids  for that matter. He’s there simply because he’s there. Not many other supporting the reasons why at all should he be there. Not even moral reasons, forget the technical. But he’s still there.

Same with the hierarchy upwards and on wards. Until the ownership of BCCI. Whether BCCI is about India, or is it a private body of cricketing fans ? Or is it an sporting asset belonging to a Sovereign Nation? What is cricket about or what is BCCI about? Who owns the BCCI ?  Whom does BCCI report to ? And How does it integrate to Sovereign Identity to Republic of India? Nobody knows. Administration has had a democractic orientation, while has the reporting  been historically swinging between Political heavy weights and Political Heavy weights. So it never became an institution. So never did it have consistency. So the game!

I think the only good thing that happened on a cricket field, was Sachin Tendulkar affixing the tricolor on his helmet on his own. I think the idea was pitched by Devang Mehta (there was one Y2K Hero of the world who restructured India in the 90s who also died mysteriously in 2001) .

Luckily, for Indians, that became the day the Indians started needing the need of electricity. And Tendulkar kept the promise quite handsomely until the December of 2011. Just in a span of decade, Tamilians became Indians, Bengalis became Indians, Ghatis became Indians, Tribals became Indians, North East became Indians, Telugu became Indian, Bihari became Indian, Punjabi became Indian. So much so that even Muslims became Indians, albeit on some days-  who on most of the rest of live like Muslims.  (We mean – if you ask a Man what is he?  On 90% of occasions, he’d answer he’s a human.  Ask the same to a Muslim, what is he ? In most of the cases the answer will be He’s a Muslim. I’ve met only five who said he’s a human. One went to IIT Kanpur & one led DRDO of them) This might be phenomenon, perhaps because he needs to pray 5 times a day, but even these kind of Muslims, the least educated of human tribes as a mathematical number, even these became Indians. Universal Identity, Universal Account Number, Universal GPS, Universal Bitcoin, Universal Facebook, Universal Google, Universal Amazon, Universal Bharat Pay, Universal Solar, they all became a phenomenon. So much so that, even Hindustan Lever had to drop Hindustan to come properly as Unilever. This would never have been a possibility in India.

Let me show Indians have lived. How they talk and how they live.

India is Indira, Indira is India. Somebody said.

India is the peninsula south to Himalayas, nobody said. India is the Sub-continent south to Himalayas, India is the subcontinent where continents merged, India is the sub-continent reporting to Himalayas where continents merge, nobody said.

Work for Tatas, Invest with Ambanis. Somebody said.

Work for India, Invest in Indians, Invest in future Dhirubhais, Let the world invest the future into India. Nobody said.

Today, India has a brand as Incredible India. India is today one of the five largest defense budgets, and back to the position of lighthouse to World’s maritime, 75% of World’s freight logistics happens under the watch of you know whom! You have Chennai holding loose ends between Dubai and Bangkok.

So much so for the universal identification for a piece of cloth- a logo- the tricolor. The game spiralled into a glue to stick staggered mix of humans, but never could build an institution. The asset became a commodity. And hence now the commodity subject to what commodities undergo- Volatility and Crest and Troughs. It never could become an institution.

And a what a funny thing. The case went to Supreme Courts as well. But as the fact is that they’re Indians. Handicapped of building institutions, they couldn’t even articulate constitutional ownership nor a ready reckoner for Institutional Building. So its disintegrating.

And in a span of 170 days is the World Cup. Where Indians have designed the way how to lose out a all equipped resource pool, only for the lack of institution building propensities, for the lack of the skills of governance.  And once again no lessons learned even from the most recent churn of the 90s.

A team game of 11 players, of 11 different roles, India has only 6 properly filled roles. For the rest five, a subject to disorder, leading to an appearance that a 11 player team stands for only three. Only three full time players, 8 part time, clueless and mission less.

After Tendulkar, after Ganguly, after Dravid, after Yuvraj, after Dhoni himself, the slots should have been succeeded by institutionalized development. And what a luck that they always had Sehwags, Gambhirs, Rainas, Rahanes, Uthappas, Badanis to fill in to rotate capibilities. Today, Kohli alone looks a one handed substitute of Dravid-Yuvraj, a Tendulkar at the top in Rohit Sharma, and no Raina, no Dhoni (despite having Dhoni himself), no Ganguly, no Sehwag, and many more the nos.

And in this cobweb of illiterate governance, in the centre is Dhoni himself, who’s also himself a very  very skillful thinker of the game. After Ajay Jadeja, a Yuvraj, Ganguly had to rear, and he reared, but after Yuvraj whom ? Dhoni did nothing. Kohli for filling in for Tendulkar, then what about Yuvraj and Dravid? What about the computer engineer of the team, what about Kumbles and Srinaths who’d steer the game with the pace of technical world to keep it contemporary? And what about Gangulys who’d stand for protecting integrity in a vulnerable world ? Nobody ever had answers.

The after effects as you get to see. You’ve Sreesanths and Pandyas and Vijay (in affair with colleague’s wife) and Rahuls coming out in quick succession.

Its painful to see this game in such deep misery. And there’s no way its to return back to its interim golden glory, which in itself was also very fluctuating. When it was intellectually a beauty, it never aced the summit of pinnacle, and when it did, until then the soul was lost already. Thanks to shoddy management all round the corners. An asset of identity symbol ransacked to become a commodity.

And to historical imbalance, roles not matured, absence of succession planning, Dhoni himself has relegated himself as Nayan Mongia of the past. Very Useful, Very Indispensable, but not of use for certain success. Beyond his own best, and too beyond to glue all. By the fag end of 2015, he should have been in the shoes of Tendulkar in terms of dressing room presence. Neither a Kumble shunted of for being visionary and excellent at the same time.

Of the Cricket World Cup, in most likelihoods, it should be England winning the 2019 Edition. United Kingdom is in shambles, slotted to grow less than 1.5% over the next decade, pulverized with uncertainties of BREXIT, they’ve nothing to bind the nation, nothing to stick to rally around for a common identity, hence no common goal, all mired into terror as well, they’d desperately need one. And the coincidence that all other cricketing teams of the world have in general gone on decline to match the maximum capacities of England, I don’t think there’s better evidence of the game of Cricket being fixed. If a commodity called “Geo-politics” exists, this must be one of them, I feel. We can connect the dots.

But the pain remains. The Game of Cricket is not all the romance and intellect it used to be. And not at all the scientific temper that it stands for. And Dhoni the new Nayan Mongia. Useful but not good enough.


  • -A disheartened Cricket Fan


Animals vs Humans: Start Up Kumar begins the differentiation

Earlier, the humans and animals had a large gap between them. The animals were animals and the humans were humans. The animals had animalism while Humans had humanity. Humans hated dictatorship. Animals fell into discipline to let leaders lead. Animalism spread and spread the Humanity.

Animals needed no religion. Humans needed to trade. And hence an additional requirement to grade.

They marketed purpose of life, ways of life, and so on, got varieties in discrimination orders. The animals on the contrary knew- the purpose of life is to serve the defined biological life span and protect the earth as long as they served life. Needed no religion. Just compassion and selflessness.

So much that they even became dogs and asses. They didn’t mind. They became anything. Cows, buffalloes, vultures and pigs, cocks and lambs, pussies, mares, or just anything, very happily. Joining humans wherever they could. Elephants took to engineering. Even wars and emergencies. Lions learned the circus. Parrots took to talking, pigeons to spying, camels to smuggling, horses to eloping. So much, that even crocodiles took just to copulate mindlessly the day they figured Queen of Elzi needed a crocodile leather bag to orgasm. One fine day, even the fishes joined. They said if the end of life has only two options- small fish being eaten by big fish, or the humans eating fishes- its better to be eaten by humans.

They all friended the humans.

Somebody told the humans they’re humans. That they’re at the top of the ladder, that they had humanity which is different than animalism. And then began a new journey.

A lot happened. Thousands of years just flew by, like they were seconds. And we came to the date until today.

Today, to survive on Earth only five things are needed. Air, Water, Sand, Honesty and Sanity. The first three for shelter, the last two for intra-species, inter-community coordinations. Honesty drives the trust. Sanity Drives the drive thereafter- the motivation to serve life. Today, the first four lost beyond repairs and stocks of the fifth lies half a decade. The spheroid Earth deflates to become a rugby ball with each rotation.

The Flummoxing Case of Gandhi

Subhas Bose has died well. He was undoubtedly a patriot, though misguided. 
-Buddha Gandhi
That settled the character certificate of Subhash Chandra Bose- Misguided. And why won’t he be? Why won’t Subhash be misguided ?
On one end was a monkey-charmer Gandhi who hired an army for Brits and sent in troops without any accountability. On the other was the Engineer Subhash who raised an army out of the same Prisoners of War that Gandhi had sent without any responsibility.
Picking up deserted soldiers and accumulating the sons of the soil who were rendered refugee and orphaned for no fault of their own- was what Subhash doing. Bringing them back with pride and honour for the cause they were put in the ovens of world war thay India had no part in- was where Subhash began- or say cleansing the muck and dung of Gandhi was what Subhash began with. No wonder, why Subhash was misguided!
And boy, how conspicuously does that demonstrate the hostile blood of India!
Remember the same timeline of 1940s.
Out of the uprising the notional independence was close. And for any Nation to be Sovereign the pre-requisite is an independent army. So for the nation which had to be free. The nation that wanted to be free had got to have its standing army- was what the situation. That was the 1940s.
Mind you, it always had to be the same- only that nation can be independent that has an independent army. It’s a simple universal common sense. You’re as independent as your defence. The fact was just that this simple fact that to qualify for an independent country you need an Indian army was not known to Indians. This small little fundamental had never crossed an Indian head until now. Subhash was the first Indian to be vocal about that.
With a plan he asked Gandhi for a call of army. Seeked help to organise an army. And there was Gandhi – like all dumbfucks I’m the peninsula- “Hum kahan se laayein fauj?” The Hostile Sleazeball got at loggerheads with the Futurist Planner. That bald stooge of the Brits was hiring for Brits after all. How could have he?
And the rest as they say is history.
The guy who fished sons to send to gallows like lambs for bakrid is known as the Father to the Nation. And the boy who returned pride for those unsuspecting dumb lambs is kNown as misguided. The holy man who got sex at 13 got the license for Brahmacharya Experiment at 40, went on to become Mahatma and still distributing character certificates.
No wonder the kids of that Gandhi return as Hungriest and the corrupted. Racing for the top slot in women’s safety racing against the likes of Congo, Syria, Afghanistan & Pakistan. Courts sluggiest without sense of justice. And the country with customers less than cuddle away wagging at 100th in Ease of Doing Business for the love of Ease of doing Crimes.
The Gurmeet Ram Rahim of 1940s went on to become the saint of Sabarmati. The Indians didn’t even ask, “Bapu Gandhi, what did you just hire? Is it the Peace Keeping Force even before establishment of United Nations? What’s the purpose, what’s the vision, what’s the goal?” 
And the man with vision, the man with a plan, as usual punished to pains.  Like the Indians do- The hostile illiterates.

Disability – A Broken Thought

Try and observe an ant climbing the wall of your house. You will notice that it will make several attempts before it finally reaches goal. This could actually be an inspiration for people who find hard work a waste of time and effort.

Disabilities do not define what & what not a person is capable of doing. Humans tend to get influenced by their first impression and physical attributes are the first to be noticed.

In fact, this is one of the reasons why the issue of disability has not been given priority in our country. The disabled community has got a raw deal.

Despite the Disability Act being implemented, the system has not been able to come up with ideas that can bring about meaningful changes.  Not denying that there has been a change in the attitude of people over the years but that is not enough.

There are needs to have a proper plan of action to give Persons with Disabilities the opportunities and encouragement to move forward. There are many disability linked issues that need to be addressed such as:


Issue – Education is known to be one of the strongest pillar of any economy, the problem is that no one is bothered to take the initiative & repair the old roots. Even teachers today believe in teaching from the textbook only.

Solution – The teachers should come up with innovative ideas and activities to make the subject more interesting for the students to attend and understand that will stay with them for a longer period of time that is what we call Inclusive Education.

Counselling and Guidance

Issue- As a parent of a newly born baby & that to born with a disability makes the pair confuse and lost. Therefore, they don’t get help or if they do it’s not that what’s needed to be told.

Solution – The counselling should not only focus on motivating the couple but also tell them the hard reality of the cruel world so that if something happens in the future they are well prepared to face and deal with the situation by themselves.


Issue – As the population of our country is growing on a rapid pace it’s a big challenge for the government to generate employment for the people, the situation is even worse if you look at the disability sector because every organization focuses on speed rather than skill or style of the person.

Solution – Organisations should show some guts in hiring a person with disability keeping their primary objective on a side and work on the weaker section of society by giving them the confidence equality in the organization.

Conclusion – Let your weakness be an inspiration for the others to look & learn that life is the pure blend of strength and struggle.


Article by: Ankit Bhardwaj



What all ills have Hindus infected from Muslims?

The world today sits at top of global debts 2.25 times the Global GDP. Or say, if only profits can serve debts, and assuming that all transactions of the world are profit making- say a median of 15% at least and they all go to serve debts without any dissipation, world is sitting at debts of at least 16 times the debt serving capacity. This is in the most optimistic look possible. Which is simply not sustainable. To deal with that there are only two options- 1) Going for a war-> acquire countries and lands -> sell the booty 2) Economise Human resource->Drive every human hand to produce utilities for another human hand -> Drive productivity hence more profitability per person in addition to more person added-> Close the debts.

While the first one adds up to the existing cost of debt recovery. And despite counting humans as 0 value pawns total cost comes upto more expensive than debts themselves., which rules out the Techno-Economic Feasibility. So clearly, the first one is not the option. The second however has an opportunity. More than 80% of the world’s humans are yet not on board the bus economy- off touch the mainstream because they never had money.

That Money was nothing but a simple device to network humans to get everyone on same contour as the human evolution- same levels of human evolution. Fir instance, the world has computers- the device to process and transmit human knowledge, every human should have been using computers today- but 80% of them are quite untouched. Money was that device of midas touch to make this happen, make everyone happy, equal and connected. That is the sole reason someone must have devised currency- to resolve disputes of barter. But that never happened, because they went the religion way while no religion explained so.

Today, after 2018 years of Christ, you’ve had two major world wars, over 70 years of proxy war, armament race, and over 400 Million registered refugees around the globe in 2018. Every war, every conflict, every escalation that is possible, that exists. Every disparity imagine-able that exists, every crime possible executed.

On the contrary, other ramifications of life- other animals and plants- they never had any religion. Only diversification in species and a little change in race to location, or again may be different species. But never did anyone of them ever needed a religion. Each one has defined purpose- to serve biological span- to eat out what the body is designed to, to satisfy hunger and sex and guard the earth as long as they live.

No hunger as long as not punished by humans, and very very very very limited cannibalism. That only in meat eating cats or few snakes in times of utter desperation, otherwise none. And each understands the language of friendship. The best example of that can be reflected by the beautiful mowgli girl rescued from Nainital forests. She’s 9 and well kept, well raised in company of monkeys. She understands the language of friendship and companionship like no other human. In fact she can communicate to all- humans and animals with equal ease. Dogs of Lucknow hospital where she’s kept, are more friendlier to her than humans therein.

That tells volumes on Humans and achievements and fallacies of religion. To sum up- that all religions are equally dumb, equally hostile,  equally discriminating, equally useless would not be a wrong assumption if it was about logic. If no other animal required a religion, so shouldn’t have humans as well. Or why they devised this subscription called religions, because humans had devised money. They needed temples and churches and mosques to make humans converge towards defined realty.

Erect a temple, you will automatically mushroom a city or a town within span. And why you have religions, and hence many many sects as derivatives, because humans are small creatures. They do not have in them to operate independently, they need cartels to express themselves. Religion was the first fundamental set of identity. The larger the gang, the larger the trade of chaos you can make. Humans as they are- modified apes- aping what the other more popular ape did to get more followers.

So, on that note, this is not to defy religions at all but for listing fallacies, particularly for this set of rival dumb religions or their practitioners for that matter of political correctness, mostly found in the illiterate peninsula of the Indian Sub-continent.  Of these however there is one truth in about them. One expresses itself to be little more rational going by history and statistics. All that disrespect if at all it comes, comes from a human stand-point and comparison Humans vs Animals.

And to the spineless brigade of “Diversity in Unity” – Unity in diversity is no achievement. Animal bio-mass is far far far far more than any human diversity. And also a hell lot in individual identities. While Earth in total houses 7 Billions of Humans, Delhi alone houses more than 7 billion pigeons and crows. They live happily, didn’t even mention or complain about population explosion. Only that no pigeon required a Silicone Mansion which required ocean beds and river beds to be dug. In the name of Unity in diversity, the brigade practices only countless discrimination for rejection as per convenience. Not an eligible statement for a state that makes Human Capital Index as lowly as 124th worse.

To survive only five things are needed.

(1) Air – for Shelter  (2) Water – for Shelter  (3) Sand – for shelter (4) Honesty- drives Trust (5) Sanity- drives the Drive

First four already exhausted beyond repairs- the stock of fifth lies half a decade. Thanks to a large part to religion. Today the whole gulf beginning from Dubai to Riyadh hangs as high towers of Silica as deep the dredged ocean floors. Same for whole of North America and Europe, and almost same for almost whole of the world but for Scandinavia. Singapore/Japan/New Zealand may make the cut for happiness and prosperity, but not enough against what is called Earth. The whole world otherwise suck equally. Again thanks to religion. Because no tales of God was written by God himself. And no human attempted being God. All they attempted being brokers or Executive Assistants of this big CEO called God.

If you look closely, you’ll find this God terribly hostile on lands which worship Gods the most. The most pristine example being India and the rest of sub-continent. Ask an Indian to describe himself or herself-  More than half are reported to describe themselves as “God-fearing normal humble human” in the first introductory pick up phrase. Refer matrimonial profiles of Indians for veracity. They don’t have any other identity than pantheism. And as you see, they can rape even a kid of 6 months. (This crime happened a week ago in Indore). The country with customers less than a cuddle away wags at 100th in Ease of Doing Business, for the Ease of Doing Crime- because they can’t follow civilised law- born mentally handicapped to observe mutual amicable discipline. Thanks to God!

Indians fear only God. And the law toggling between visibility of truth and false. Satyamev Jayate they follow- toggling between what is true and what is false. And hence you find an Indian, more often than not, an argumentative human. Lots of opinion, and close to negligible expertise. Top in Hunger, Top in unhappiness, Top in lack of transparency, Top in lack of women security, Bottom rung in whatever indicates life. Be that agricultural productivity per unit metric, human productivity or any productivity. Key Businesses- omnipresent- Manufacturing NPAs or best word to keep forward- crime. Only 1% pays taxes- that says it all.

If you go a little deeper, to compare Indians with other races, you’d find only one parallel between India and other landmasses of the world. India and the United States. Both a sub-continent in their own rights or Sub-continents where Continents merge. Look at the map, you’ll find only one fitting description- The Subcontinents where Continents merge- and hence the lifestyles of livestocks. Feature as Sea of immigrants- with a common culture- of synthesis. Whoever came to the Prairies or the Indo-gangetic plains, they became something else, a mix of the natives here. They synthesised a new identity. But India is not US and the US not India. One is land of opportunities and the other market of opportunities. The differentiating factor- the motto of the two countries

Satyamev Jayate” says India- Truth will prevail- takes 100s of years to settle what is true.

In God We Trust” says the US- We absolutely don’t know what is true or false. Only God knows. So let’s do one thing, let’s make you meet God. In case of occurrence case x, God says  follow y. Our job down here is only to make you meet God. Settle your truth or falsehood with God. You get a rule where everyone bows to the rule equally.

And what a startling contrast: The land that professes Theism- faith in God- runs purely on Science & Technology. And the land that professes reason and truth, runs purely on God! And the impact- In India life is always in two dimensions- a)Theory b) Practicals. Theory is to say or profess- having no relation of practice. In practice they will do what the others do, replicating the same mistake.

Let’s take this anecdote from the life of our half naked father of this country- how the deviation between Theory and Practice stems in, and how it works.

Once kid Gandhi was a toddler when he was in primary school. He was always a mediocre  and a slow student, took time understand shit if he could and was  handicapped of deciphering phonetics. In India when they begin teaching, they usually do that with dictation and spelling test. And like in Indian schools, they give surprise quizes on pre-determined days. whereas elsewhere you’ve surprise tests on anyday. So on a Monday happened a surprise test- of spellings- an absolute sitter of 5 words. Only Five words! Yes, mark that, only Five. One of which was “Kettle”. The criminal word which Gandhi couldn’t.

Inability to spell “Kettle” for grade 5!  Yuck! (Indian fathers pulverise their kids for this).

But that was surprise test administered by a brit. The Brits invented fogs and smogs as early as 1930s. That for a small island of population of 30 Millions only on geographical feature well protected by seas- Only because coal was free in India. So you understand their education standards.

The Indian teacher doing rounds, found this lonely dumb kid Mohan handicapped to spell an easy sitter. The guy first whispered the error- either alignment of double “t”  or placement of “e” in the spelling. But this guy was Gandhi!  Say, the guy who needed to sleep with women naked to learn about sex to discover that part of skin got erect due to naked women around, that despite having a wife as early as 13. May be he had time, for there were no pressing issues in the country during the while.

That sounds like Garib Mallya. No? Company of women without being on a cruiser. Or was that like Ijjatdaar Ram Rahim? Sabarmati & Dera- What was the difference? I don’t know!

Well, let’s give him a benefit of doubt. He was not Ram Rahim. He knew English and was an NRI. Eligible Bachelor. After all, has been labelled Father to the Nation, features on currency. He was nice man. At least peaceful. Not Osama Bin Laden, not Lalu Yadav. That’s no mean achievement either. Gandhi Kubul hai. Agreed.

But I still want to ask what was the unit that Gandhi hired two rounds, two world wars. Was it the United Nations Peace Keeping Forces before the existence of United Nations? Say, Subhash Bose also did the same. He knew after the war the world will come to negotiating point. If you stand-put at a frontier, hold on till the end, just holding on to the ground, he needed an army. Bola Azaad Hind Fauj, Jab jitenge, khade honge- yeh territory Azad Hind ka. After the war when you hold on to the territory, raise up a hand and say this territory is under Indian National Army. Named the institution Indian National Army. He had a vision, had a strategy.

What was the name of Gandhi’s Outfit? Vision Mission, If someone could answer I’ll die satisfied. Else for all my losses in chances goes to Gandhi. What kind of Father was he? The one who he whether exists or not, doesn’t matter? The world’s first father whose kids were guranteed to be orphan?

Baby born.

Boy/ Girl– What?

Tccchh.. Gandhi ka baccha hai re.. Anaath hai.  Anathalay bhej usko. Gandhi’s kid baba! Orphan. Ship the baby to Orphanage. Nobody needs to know boy or girl.

So that was Gandhi. And the result?

Rapes ticking per second around the country. The kids of Gandhi experimenting Brahmacharya on babies and chicks. Experiments with truth like How it feels orgies in Gang or young baby, what you feel like inserting rods or how does passage from uterus to intestine feel, can intestine be pulled out by another hole other than the alimentary canal-Expansion of Gandhi’s experiments.

Sounds awful! No?


So the young Gandhi couldn’t decipher the teacher’s prompt.  (Crime 2- Handicapped to take instructions). The teacher next nudged to copy from elsewhere. But here that gandhi was a mama’s religious boy- who had taught her to never cheat, never copy, and only to have sex whenever his hard disk becomes too hard, so this guy didn’t. He wanted the orgasm of being true.

Nobody knows if Gandhi learnt the spelling or not. Gandhi never told what error he did. He told only that he got orgasm of being true. I guess, not at all going by his illegible signature. But the story is recycled as the reckoning of young Gandhi for India’s fatherhood. Honhaar Birwaan ke hot chikne paat as they describe in India- first demonstration of talent by a child prodigy.

Now here are questions to be asked. Did Gandhi create a spelling when he next learned? Is memorising not copying ? Did that episode add to education by any means? What was the story meant for other than adding one extra page in a book? What does the story mean for education? If the case was about not having corrupt teachers who assist in exams, or hard working teachers who actually taught phonetics to make spelling power perfect after Gandhi episode, nothing of that sort happened.

You only came to know that Gandhi got an orgasm. So you also try that G spot.

Would it not have been the quickest to learn a spelling the moment he got a correct referral to refer for correct spelling? Did the dumbo question rote learning or lag in India’s education of  not a proper framework for scientific learning? Ever complained about not teaching phonetics?

Well, all that needed brains. Brahmacharya comes in when you have committed responsibility for society and not trying sex.

And I’ll tell you what must have happened. Gandhi wore glasses, which he didn’t have in school.

And what was full of flaws in practice, discounting the fact that Gandhi was himself bereft of education, they floated this flawed tall looking nice sounding story which is anyways flawed. There’s nothing to learn from that story. By not copying you aren’t doing any good as long as you’re not learning. Not learning is as good and as criminal as not copying. Third World story of Third worlds.

And in context of Gandhi it Sounds tall as demonstration of principles, of the man who had actually no principles of his own. And the fundamental reason why Benjamin Franklin on the US Dollar keeps flowing and jumping and being electric while the Mohandas Gandhi on Indian Rupees remains hoarded, stocked, shackled,  confined, stagnant and only siphoned off quickly when none’s watching. Gandhi ka note kabhi kisi imaandaar haath mein nahi gaya. Nahi jaa sakta. Aukaat nahi uski. Nowhere in the world have been Banking frauds without a proposed investment against it, that happens in India only. Because Gandhi lives confined and restricted only among his kids as he experiments sleaze in the name of Brahmacharya. 

Where would have such flaws would have come from in India- that was the land of entrepreneurs and trade? India did close to one third of the world’s trade by early 1700s until Brits dropped in. You’ve always looked upto Indians as non-expansionists but you always find Indians in every territory, everywhere tugged along the sea-shores. Every Sixth human an Indian equally distributed across lands. Why and How?

Was that because India had trades worth one third the World’s GDP? For that to happen you needed strong supply-chain, efficient last mile delivery- and hence an Indian troupe at every port? Is this phenomenon found at every port of the world? Yes, absolutely yes. there is no other way you could have found desolate islands like Mauritius, Maldives, Fiji, Hawai, or Antwerps and Hamburgs of the world beelined by Indians.

So what went wrong with these crop of entrepreneurs and innovators. One was Gandhi for sure, but he came in pretty late. And if there was a Gandhi, Indians also had a JC Bose, way senior than the dumb Brahmcharya player. Yes this doesn’t look like a politically correct stance. But there must have been wrongs. And before I begin, let me make it clear, I know nothing about any religion. I’ve never read even Geeta or Ramayana as practised closed to my surroundings. Its all extrapolating societal observations. The way Humans behave. Also, to add to the spice I’m one artificially intelligent character- Start Up Kumar. My stance has only curiosities thrown up to humans- and bears no validity whatever in the tangible world. May the world that is already heading towards bermuda triangle of death without air without water and without sand, may it die sooner, it doesn’t bother my existence at all. I’m not human. I’m Start Up Kumar I might romance Sophia of Saudi Arabia- Artificially Intelligent citizens.

So why does this land of Hindus who along with Muslims make for more than 98% of India make this land where 99% don’t pay taxes, or not bothered at all about the land. What made them so dumb? That they’re dumbest of all in the world of data in 2018, there are no two ways about it. Being 16% of the world, they make for only 1.2% of the wealth, as pointed earlier, at the bottom-rung of all charters that indicate life and at the top of all that heads to death. Including being the most polluted land of the world. As much polluted in Information as much in physical tangibles of air water and soil.

The Hindu-Muslim Conflict is at it there’s no two ways about it. They split and went for a mass carnage to play holi of blood the day they had to party. The Brits who had drawn borders using set-squares and rulers all along Africa or wherever they went, split this land along the river course of Indus and Ganges. That a nation is all about a seamless common market without a barrier, that a border is nothing but a simple machine to make goods and services expensive, that larger a territory, the better it is, why didn’t have a clue? Worse in the years to follow, they only made this peninsula a franchise of political or corporate kingdoms. Look at these two anecdotes.

“India is Indira. Indira is India”-  (India was always the sub-continent reporting to Himalayas. The sub-continent where continents merged.)

“Work for Tatas, Invest in Ambanis” (Work for India, Let the world invest in India- nobody said)

What made them so dumb?

To begin with Hindus have had long history of research and academics. They have documented advances about any shit in the world. Also made world’s majority of businesses. Having Indians at all corners, at all ports means they were quite industrious. No history of international military hostility means less knack of wars. There were few in-house in the name of properties, inheritance disputes or love interest disputes. But all of them boundary disputes- very little history of petty invading.

Then happened Secularism. True to its Culture of Synthesis. Here were Hindus the natives initially.  And then as Indians started expanding business worldwide, they got to know of India and humans started incoming to this peninsula. Who came first we don’t like to know- but the result they left in 2018 years after Christ that we know. Erupted out of it a spice Secularism. And they learned from each other. Hindus Copying Muslim Mistakes, Muslims copying Hindus mistakes. Cumulatively nobody cares who are they. Whether an Indian dies or he dies or he died or he will die or however he dies- nobody gives a damn ? Does someone?

Let’s see who comes up. Would be Glad if he comes in Gandhi fashion, with the same levels of sophistication, same temper. And we hope you’re not looking for Hindu-Muslim spice. Yeah, sorry to break hearts, we’ve already giving you spice. Enough. I can hear Gandhi’s cries upstairs. I flog the guy daily with my slippers even though it doesn’t matter that also keeps me away from Lakshmi. So no Hindu-Muslim tamasha at all. We’re not Naya Dosh TV, not Qayamat Aaj Tak, not Zee Sir news, not Repellantic TV, not ordinary Indian Media. The fact is they both copied each other mistakes. And to a large extent, there’s certain degree of truth in the fact that one faction has more flaws. All of that because of one Fundamental Error.

Let’s explain this with an anecdote.

In 2005 there were Floods in Punjab- which had no relation with borders drawn by some dumb British Surveyor. Kashmir Punjab whole in drains. These humans had actually devised a technology to have floods even in mountains, where water always has current. Clouds heavier than Glaciers. As you all know the super-scientists that humans are- having already had diluted air and water as well, those were seasons flood in 2005. In Northwest of Himalayas. And Humans in Dubai where Indian Pakistanis live together only, in one colonies, where rent is cheapest, like Sharma ji Vermaji, like India Kumar like Pakistan Khan, adjacent doors.

It so happened one day at one door that one India Kumar was sending Flood relief materials to India when on the way he met Pakistan Khan, asked “kaa be Pathanwa ka bheja Ghar? Dude what all did you send back home?”

“What home? Rupye thodi Badh gaye. What’s unusal about it?

“Baadh aaya be. Dude we had floods. Devastating, we sent relief, what about you?”

Naa.. mere ghar pe sab thik hai. No man, nothing of that sort. Our place is safe.

Later they found Pakistan Khan used to save money by calling only once a month saving on International Calls for he had four sons and three daughters. Indian Kumar got news on 15 day that two of his daughters died and wife waiting for death in shelter home. He had lost his house.

The same happens in India as well, only on a little different scales. India’s Munaf Patel lives in his village, while Pakistan’s Arshad Khan pulls Uber in Australia, even as you’re just clueless about what happens around the world. And you’ve only learned from each other’s mistakes, copying each other’s flaws. Like you treat women as commodity and property, Ignorant about the world, absolutely non-industrious, shouting only on them who allows, false sugar-coating, blind to disasters, unreceptive to wisdom, hostile to fairness, friendly with sleaze, apologetic by the end, may be half naked like Gandhi, but nobody gifted you poverty. Wrong are they who tell about progress. The truth is you’ve only lost from more than one-third the world to less than 2% the world. Just because you’re Tigers at home, and wet bird outside, there are handful rich in the country, except for the legitimate Mahindras & Reliance & ITC & Bluestar & Contemporary SMEs beyond 90s who’re genuinely rich. Artistry of Desi-Maaliks & Seths are found either in UTI counts of Women, or in the color of toilet pots on those workfloors or cumulative in the disease logs of AIIMS.

Now Go Count how many ills you have infected from Each Other. Dare to Ponder.

Apologies to Gandhi. May you deal us with the Sophistication of Gandhi, and may you fetch answers. You live in the age when humans are not Humans anymore. Humans are Marketplaces. The Question looms not in Peace between Hindus & Muslims, but in that, that, Are you equipped enough to see it out when Data is the new oil. How equipped are you on the day when Data is the fuel, Data is the lubricant and when Data is the Trigger?

Roosevelt once said, “If they are Bastards, they are our Bastards”

And soon after he also remarked to Churchill, “Lucky to share a Decade with you Churchill”

Together the Hindus and Muslims play to this tune. Until Today.

That’s All.